"What happens if a camel with two humps gets the hump" "A tromedary." "One thing I've never tried in Egypt is cheese-flavoured sheesha." "Real men don't eat quiche, Useless." "It's not all the way out - I need a bit of lubrication these days." "Stop touching my bottom, mama."

Hash 1440 saw us assemble at the Rehydration Site. Why? Because it was the Rehydration Hash. Now fancy that! The Hash kicked off shortly after 1pm and it was surprisingly windy, Erect Runner having welcomed us to this, the 16^th Annual Rehydration Hash. He also thanked Spoilt Little Bratwurst, Lotfi, The Sheriff Of Nottingham and Flusher for sponsoring the wonderful Tea-shirt. The runners had a bit of a run to the first three cheques, while your scribe was with the walkers. Soon, we reached the first checc, the traditional Scottish one, where the Sheriff Of Nottingham, Cookie, Flusher and our Pen offered us whisky and lemon, washed down with chocolate-topped tiffin and shortbread. Dirty Girl (Julia), a stunning mountainbiking specialist (are all American graduates as beautiful as her?), lost one of her digital camera batteries on the way. Anyway, we strolled on from there to the second Czech, where the Colombian contingent served us up a refreshing rum and 'Coke' (not cocaine) drink, known as a cuba libra, along with tasty crisp-like snacks dipped in a scrummy sauce, for which we had Melts In Her Mouth, his wife, Barbie's Squashed Balls and Max to thank. We moved on to the Egyptian checc, where Should've Been Blonde, Pol Pot and Hala gave us taamiya sandwiches and kirkade, with or without vodka. The fourth cheqq, at the Saudi tree, was the English cheque, manned by Jim and his wife, as well as Bam-Bam and Easy Wife of Bam-Bam. Jim did us proud with a succulent curry, which we enjoyed with lashings of cool Sakkara.

And so on to the fifth, German Czech, at the second Saudi tree, where Kafka, Not In The Mood, Christian, Charlotte and her children gave us quiche, pretzels and other goodies, including German Warsteiner beer. The sixth chec was the traditional Saudi water one, followed by the French stopped, manned by Underdeveloped, Alain et la belle Estelle, where we enjoyed pastis and crackers coated in pork pâté, gathered round Eric's English Landrover. Your scribe sneaked a lift to the eighth and final cheque in Barbie's Greased Balls' 4x4. It was our first-ever Trinidadian (does that word exist?) stop, where Cock Turner and Spreads Easily treated us to Caribbean butt dancing. Spoilt Little Bratwurst was also involved in this stop, where we got stuck into more rum and 'Coke'. The music was great today; many people thought that the music at the last chekk was the greatest of all.

From there we wandered back to the RV, where Mohamed (welcome back) was getting ready to do some BBQing. Your scribe didn’t stay the night, but about a score of diehards did: the weather was perfect for this, while the full moon was at its apogee or perigee, as your scribe was informed by Bowl Licker. As always, the Rehydration Hash was a roaring success, but what distinguished this year's event was the excellent food offered by the cheqqs. On-On!!

1. New Smelly Galabiya: Marie-Louise
2. Old Smelly Galabiya: Andy
3. Magic Lantern: Little Dina
4. Toilet Seat: Spoilt Little Brat
5. Chain of Pain: Little Rachel
6. Underpants Cap: Wing Nut On-On Useless

Older scribes can be found here http://www.cairohash.com/docs/old