"Imagine dog sitting and the dog destroys one of your books, published in 1845." "She's not a lightweight cheap date." "I'm at your Majestic Cervix, said the Bishop to the Queen." "Rudie doesn't have any infectious diseases."

We were at the Picnic Site for Hash 1481. There were six human Hares as well as two canine Hares today, so it was eight on the eighth of the eighth of the eighth. Your scribe was one of the walking Hares. We'd set the trails early this morning and then gone home for a rest. By the time the Hash started, there was a warm wind blowing. We walkers headed off towards a point between that well-known landmark, the bosomy feature, and the New Ain Sukhna Road, stopping for a tcheqq in among some little sandhills. Everyone then found the false trail heading straight to the bosom, before Cucking Funt located the real trail, which also took us there but via a circuitous route. It was quite a scramble up the bosom. After the cheque on top, it was even more of a scramble down the backside, having found the niche in the middle. Anyway, the trail took up the range of cliffs to the north, where we had the third Czech and where we could see the runners approaching the bosom from the east, as they headed for home. Soon we were coming down again and strolling back to the chariots. This week's run took about an hour, the walk 1 hour 10 mins.

Spoilt Little Brat kicks the Circle into gear, punishing this week's visitor - Eddie from Nigeria and then the Hares, and then the Hares again, after Bosoms From Brussels drank from her right hand. After them, it's Can't Make Her Come, Castrati, Cock Tamer and Useless who are called up for not signing in. And when two Hares drink! Over to Can't Make Her Come, who invites a bunch of cool dudes and one dudette to indulge in refreshments, namely the Hamburg Sex Bomb, Austrian Werner, Rudie, Easy Ride Herr, Spoilt Little Brat, Doc Livingstone and Easy Ride Herr's driver. We sing them all, 'They ought to be publicly pissed On'. Meanwhile, Erect Runner reminds us that the Rehydra Hash will soon be upon us, while a number of volunteers for the national drinks cheques join him for a drink: Rude Yard (America), Austrian Werner (Austria), Should've Been Blonde (Egypt - thanks for helping with the beer today) and Bobby Williams (England).

Back to Stewbie, who presents Cock Tamer with a fabulous 10-Hare mug and we sing her the 'Countdown' song. We then sing Doc Livingstone 'Hashing Birthday to You', before Erect Runner steps forward again as he's already forgotten who's volunteered for the national Czechs. It is at this point that a ghastly black plume of smoke appears above the cliffs to the north of us, reminding us that Africa's largest city isn't necessarily winning its battle against pollution. Over to The Dude, who launches the raffle, with Castrati extracting Black End Pepper (grabs a case of Sakkara), BEP again (opts for a cigarette lighter), Doc Livingstone (scrumps the second case of Sakkara), Easy Ride Herr (obtains the special water bottle) and Eddie (settles for the last prize, the special water bottle holder). So that was that and we all headed back to the megalopolis, where the On-On was held at La Rosa restaurant in the fashionable Digla district of Maadi. On-On!!

1. New Smelly Galabiya: Marie-Louise
2. Smelly Galabiya: Andy

Older scribes can be found here http://www.cairohash.com/docs/old