"Useless, I was a bit too pissed to remember everything that happened."

We were at the Sandbowl near the Picnic Site for Hash 1486. The Hares were John R, the invalid in the pirate hat; Athletic Supporter, wearing a Mongolian chair on her head; Black End Popper; Lou Borough Qunt (her rat dog was wearing a Ronald Reagan cowboy hat); and Doctor Wayne. In fact, your scribe wasn't there at all, but Easy Ride Herr, made some excellent notes which he forwarded to your editorial staff, so here goes. Before the trails started, Spoilt Little Currywurst called seven new ones into the circle: 1.) Caroline - working at the CAC; ex-friend of Carol Kodak from Kuwait and a former relative of Telly Savalas; 2.) Alison, from Chicago, at the AUC, doing Arabic and sexy studies; 3.) John, from Scotland, who looks for oil - he arrived in the Land of Sand last night and still has a hangover from the ACE; 4.) Michael, an AUC professor who likes geometry and cooking fuul; 5.) Hans, a German civil engineer, who likes sewage and looks like sewage, as well as resembling a youthful Papa Noel, apart from the wrong hat; 6.) Bob, from the Netherlands, developing the new Cairo Airport terminal, but hates flying; 7.) Roy, a US flight engineer, who works with Madame Petra but likes flying.

Easy Herr Rider went on the walk. The walkers headed westwards towards the cement factory (only 12km away), with a nice cool wind from the northwest. The first check was on a high cliff with a very nice view and a tough wind. Gordon's green cylinder hat blew off but he was quick enough to get it back. After a short rest we had a cool walk further north. Little Jasmine, who left her lovely mother Charlotte back at RV because of her broken leg, said: "I love Fasching (Carnival) better than this..." The second check was something 4 the old plonkers, a virgin check. But we only had one - Alison - who checked it out, watched by a lot of curious plonkers from the top of another nice cliff; but it was a false trail (maybe not for her...). She must be named Forever Virgin. At the third check, the little rat dog weed on Wayne who thought, it was raining. So, the walk (stony and hilly) took about 50 mins. We marched through a very pleasant valley at sunset, with lumps of petrified wood everywhere, millions of years old. The walkers and runners arrived back at the RV at the same time. A wonderful job by the Hares. The runners said it was really hard, tough, flat and very nice.

At the RV, some crazies tried to slide down the sand bowl sides on plastic bags. They all came tumbling down, but hamdullilah, without any injuries. Athletic Supporter and The Dude welcomed the thirsty walkers and runners with a very tasty maracuja-orange-vodka cocktail, which was really very refreshing. Thanx again for that!!! Spoilt Little Brat now calls us in for the circle. Bob says the walk was brilliant for the last 500m, while Rude Yard says the run was very, very good. SLB calls up some nice young virgins with funny hats with blow pipe thingies on top. Some blow like Hell (Sarah, Caroline, Marcie, Wayne). The first song is the 'Spankers' song, which everybody likes. The Lion Farted also gets a d-d for forgetting where the Pyramids are. The Religious Adviser, His Excellency Stewart, then invites the Hares into the middle, while Wayne, the Texan teacher, sings the sheep song: mäh-mäh-mäh... Can't Make Her Come and Black End Popper get excited by the nice female Hashers and invites them (even with their hats on) for another down-down, again the famous: 'What a spank, what a spank, what a spank, spank, spank...'

Stewart now orders Wayne into the middle again for talking nonsense in the desert, as well as Bob + Diane for misbehaving (they had some drinks before the walk started). After that, it's the ladies' hat competition: Lou Borough Qunt sports a crazy bull hat with big horns (like Rudolph, the Red-nosed Reindeer); little Jasmine (the lovely daughter of the lovely Charlotte) has a very tall black hat, at least 1m high; a French girl, a very, very large hat from Paris; Mary Fran, a Mongolian chair; Ineke, a white handmade hat with big bells; and Sarah, an iceblock hat. Finally, Athletic Supporter wins the women's competition. We now have the male contenders and the competition (nothing else) was stiff between Spoilt Little Brat (brown cowboy hat); Gordon (a big green plastic basket); The Duke (a military cap with bullets, made out of Stella and Sakara cans); Bad B (his old regimental fairytale cap); Black End Popper: (a funny big bull hat); Useless (a World War II Panzer helmet, even though he wasn't even at the Hash); Stewart (his normal hat); and Easy Ride Herr (an idiot green hat). And NL is declared the winner. Who is NL?

As for the raffle, there were three nice big baskets with secret contents. The nice girl from Brooklyn won the first; Mary from Georgia the second; and of course, Alain, the Alien, the third. Then Easy Ride Herr asks everyone for 60 seconds' attention. Three days ago, he visited the Moqattam district, where the catastrophe happened. Big rocks fell down from the plateau onto many 'houses' in this poor quarter of Cairo. Many people died, many are homeless. He is collecting clothes, toys, household goods etc. for the poor people and will give them (together with his Egyptian friend Tareq, the famous Fiat taxi pilot) directly to them. Anyone who wants to can bring some things he doesn't need to the ACE on Friday before 3 p.m. or send Frank an email: Frank_Schoenfelderko@yahoo.de (or even an SMS - 012 518 7268). And finally Bobby leads us in 'Swing Low' before the On-On at La Rosa. A really nice CH3. On-On!!

1. New Smelly Galabiya: Marie-Louise
2. Smelly Galabiya: Andy

Older scribes can be found here http://www.cairohash.com/docs/old